nostalgia..

i remember the boy, but i don't remember the feeling anymore...

i was cleaning my inbox (email PFC) since yesterday and found lots of unanswered surveys (like the one below this post) and messages from long-time friends.. this morning,i noticed this e-mail dated wayback 2004. it is one of the only 2 messages under my 2004 folder, i suddenly got curious since i have totally forgotten about it.

so i opened my 2004 folder and i now remembered everything... it's the e-mail of my ex-boyfriend a week after we broke up. suddenly, i hear a "theme-song" playing in the background ("Drowning" - by the Backstreet Boys) and memories of the past flashed right in front of me..

Dear Claire,

How would I begin this.... Well just wanted to thank you for sharing the past 3 years of your life with me, I enjoyed each moment we spent together. I admit I have faults and I have caused you pain sometimes directly or indirectly but that does not mean I've taken you for granted - nor the effort that you have showed and the things that you have made.

You're one of the greatest things that ever happened to my life and I'll treasure all the precious moments you have shared with me. I can't thank GOD enough for bringing you into my life but everything has an end.

"TO every thing there is a season, a reason, and a time to every purpose under the heaven." I keep holding back the tears when you said those words but I can't bear to see you in pain and even caused you more pain. if this makes you happy and it will ease up the pain, then O am willing to set you free.

You are one of the 3 woman whom I shed tears for but am happy I did.

A time to search and a time to give up as lost.

One of the hardest thing to do, is to give up something that means a lot to you; letting go is not an easy thing to do.... we always hear the saying "If you love someone set him/her free and if he/she comes back then you are meant to be", easier said than done, right? But it is only then that you will know that you trully love a person, if you are able to give up something so precious. What an irony but sometimes that what life teaches us.


"He has made everything appropriate in its time, " everything happens for a reason under HIS plan.

Once again I would like to thank you and wish you all the happiness in life.
I'll still be here for you as a friend.

AJ

almost 4 years have passed.. sadly, we lost communication and we didn't end up friends.. we ended up as mere aquaintances.. well, yes we were friends, but not that kind of friend whom you could spend some time with or share text messages with.. anyway, i haven't heard anything about it since i resigned from my old company. it's only a month ago when i learned that he had also resigned and went back to his hometown.

to you AJ, thanks for the wonderful memories.. i am now a stronger person, thanks to your words of kindness. it is my fervent wish that you find the happiness that you have forever searched for.. God bless you!